A Glimpse of Light

Maybe it's because I just came back from a great holiday not too long ago, but being at work really stinks right now. It may be just "one of those days", but whatever it is, I'm not feeling too good about myself. Is there such a thing as taking a break from being bored? By the looks of it, I don't see myself getting anymore work to do at work anytime soon, even though I was promised it on the first day that I came back from holidays. I know that I've brought this up a lot, and I'm sorry if I'm starting to sound like a broken record, but I'm really upset with myself because I feel like I'm wasting my life away, one slow, boring day at a time and I'm not really doing anything to change. It's really starting to effect my own lifestyle.  I'm just not motivated to be active at all. I sit around in an office chair all day just waiting for myself to think of something to do. I feel lazy and useless. But I know that they really like me at work, and I am getting a great amount of income from them, and I know that will help Dan and I get that much closer to buying a house. This is a huge sacrifice for me to make in order to achieve our goals this year. I just wish I could have an end in sight.

This is my workspace at the office. It has recently been changed around to add another desk. I get the dark corner.

To brighten the mood a bit, in my free time (who am I kidding, my whole life is free-time!) I have been looking into getting involved in photography. I think it's something that I would really enjoy, and just before Christmas I got my first photography camera! I really have no idea where to start and what to do, so if anyone reading this has any suggestions, I would really appreciate it! Since we are a bit low on cash this year, I didn't want to spend too much in taking classes, so I found a website where this photographer has free lessons on her own website and it's free to take! Plus she even helps you along the way and gives you advice through the assignments that she gives at the end of each lesson! I thought this would be perfect, since I can do most of this during my work hours! So I read through the first lesson and I loved it! I had already learned so much! But then for the assignment, I haven't been able to accomplish it yet. See, cameras make noise when you take pictures, and there's not much to take pictures of in my quiet office, so the assignments I would have to complete at home. But I still like to think it's something that I can do in my free-time both at work and at home. I was hoping that I could finish all 10 lessons and assignments by the time Dan is finished school in April. I'll have to work really hard at it, but I think it's possible. And it'll keep me occupied and more motivated to do more with myself. After high school I never really had any interest in a specific subject to have it worth going to college or university for, so now I feel like I'm slowly finding my way. And maybe when I'm actively involved with this, I will be able to feel better about myself and not think so much about my situation at work.